Still too emotionally electric from yesterday's funeral and the previous days of gathering with family -- and simply too tired, quite honestly, to write a coherent post. I gave the eulogy for my dear mother and that writing has left me wrung out, although satisfied with a job done to the best of my abilities. She was also, and I believe more memorably, honoured in a brilliant little film -- a collage of home movies edited, captioned, and put to music by my nephew who recently graduated from film school and is currently working in sound design for video games. My brother-in-law similarly put together a brilliant show with family photographs captioned, sequenced, and accompanied by absolutely perfect music. The photographs had been culled over the past several weeks from mom's collection and then augmented in the last few days by panicked calls for shots of this nephew or that niece with their granny.
There was a surprising number of pre-family shots of my mother that I had never seen before. Some day I might write about the response that triggered, but I'm not sure I quite understand it yet. Suffice it to say she was so beautiful, lively, engaged, and even social in a way I rarely glimpsed in my life with her -- or is that her life with me?
At any rate . . . . I'm off to meet my siblings at her condo. We're to choose a few items we'd like, prepared to let go (I hope) lightly if someone else wants them much more. There has been so very much good will and support between us, I'm counting on it to continue. . . . but I do expect that this might also be a day that both drains and sustains. . . . (how does that work, really? what are the psychic physics or math involved? But it's true somehow, don't you agree, that some events or encounters do both at once?)
So I've written a bit, after all, but I'm right, am I not, that I'm not yet coherent enough for blogging on the topic. I'll leave you with this wonderful photograph, one I'd never seen before this week. My sisters chose it